For decades, people have wondered about Barry Diller’s private life. From his powerful Hollywood career to his long relationship with designer Diane von Furstenberg, the questions have never stopped. Now, at 83, Diller is setting the record straight in his new memoir, Who Knew, and it’s as honest and refreshing as it gets.
What Did Barry Diller Reveal About His Sexuality?
In an excerpt published by New York Magazine, Diller shares something deeply personal: before meeting Diane von Furstenberg, he had only been interested in men.
He writes that he had never come out publicly but had made a promise to himself. He wouldn’t pretend to be something he wasn’t. “I would live with silence, but not with hypocrisy,” he said.
So, when he and Diane started seeing each other, the reaction was instant. “People started saying, ‘Huh? What is it with this person? We thought he liked only men.’” But the connection between them was real. And it was visible.
How Did Barry Diller and Diane von Furstenberg Meet?
Their love story didn’t begin with fireworks. In fact, Diller recalls that Diane dismissed him when they first met. But things changed a year later at a dinner party for a mutual friend.
“I was instantly bathed in such attention and cozy warmth I couldn’t believe it was the same woman,” Diller wrote. They ended up talking alone on a sofa, and according to him, there were sparks.
Soon after, they had dinner at her apartment and ended up, as Diller puts it, “making out like teenagers.” It was unexpected, spontaneous, and filled with emotion. “There was no effort, no reasoning, no what’s-going-on-here,” he said. “Just sheer excitement.”
Did They Stay Together After That First Spark?
Not exactly. They dated for a few years and even lived together, but they split in 1981 after Diane had an affair with actor Richard Gere. That could’ve been the end of the story.
But it wasn’t. A decade later, Diane came back into his life. And then, ten years after that, in 2001, they got married.
Diller writes, “We weren’t just friends. We aren’t just friends. It was an explosion of passion that kept up for years.”
Why Has There Been So Much Speculation Over the Years?
Because Diller never used labels. People didn’t know what to make of the relationship. Was it romantic? Was it a friendship? Was he gay, bisexual, something else?
He doesn’t use any of those words in his book. Instead, he points to how much has changed. He believes sexuality is more fluid now and that people shouldn’t feel boxed into rigid definitions.
He also praised Europeans for having “a wiser attitude” about sexuality. And at the end of the day, he says he knows what his relationship with Diane is. That’s all that matters.
How Does Barry Diller Feel About the Public’s Opinions?
He doesn’t seem too bothered.
“What others think sometimes irritates but mostly amuses us,” he writes. “We know, our family knows, and our friends know. The rest is blather.”
It’s clear that their bond, no matter how others describe it, is built on love, respect, and years of shared history. And it’s just as clear that Diller has finally found peace with how their story is told.
