When it comes to Hollywood marriages, long-lasting ones are few and far between. But John Lithgow and his wife, Mary Yeager, have defied the odds with their 43-year-long marriage that is still going strong. What’s the secret to their successful relationship? According to Lithgow, it all comes down to a simple yet romantic rule that Mary laid down early on: “Nothing useful.”
A Love Story That Started with Fate
John Lithgow, the 79-year-old Emmy-winning actor, first met Mary Yeager, a retired UCLA professor, back in 1980. At the time, Lithgow was out of work and rehearsing for a project in Los Angeles. A mutual friend set them up on a date, and as Lithgow recalls, there was a clear sign that it was meant to be.
“I went to Harvard, and she is from Montana. When I went up to her door to pick her up, I noticed she lived at the corner of Montana Street and Harvard Avenue,” he shared. “I thought, ‘There might be something here.’ And actually, we were married about a year later.”
Since then, their relationship has been filled with love, laughter, and mutual respect—and perhaps a few well-thought-out gifts that definitely weren’t electric can openers!
The “Nothing Useful” Rule – Keeping Romance Alive
During a recent interview on Live with Kelly and Mark, Lithgow revealed one of his wife’s rules when it comes to gifts:
“She said, ‘Nothing useful’ — which I consider the most romantic gift ever.”
The audience (and Kelly Ripa!) loved the idea, with Ripa even joking that it should be “written into marital vows.”
Mary’s rule comes from a place of past experience—her first husband apparently bought her practical gifts like electric can openers, and that just didn’t spark joy for her. Lithgow, ever the loving husband, has fully embraced this philosophy, ensuring that their relationship always includes thoughtful and sentimental gestures.
A Marriage of Opposites: Professor & Actor
In an industry where actors often marry other actors, John Lithgow’s relationship is refreshingly different. He once joked:
“Professors and actors are not supposed to marry. Our lives are so incompatible.”
And yet, their relationship works perfectly. Lithgow, known for his legendary roles in 3rd Rock from the Sun, The Crown, and countless other films and TV shows, has spent much of his life traveling and filming. Yeager, on the other hand, had a successful academic career, teaching history at UCLA.
Instead of letting their different lifestyles create distance, they found ways to make it work.
Turning Work Trips into Mini Vacations
Another golden rule in their marriage? Travel together whenever possible.
Lithgow shared in a past interview that Yeager always joins him when he’s filming abroad, turning his work trips into romantic getaways.
“We’ve worked out this great system whereby she arrives to visit in all these exotic locations when I have only about two weeks left.”
By this point, Lithgow explains, he’s already settled into the project and isn’t stressed or overwhelmed, allowing them to truly enjoy their time together.
“At the end of the job, we go off on holiday somewhere. It’s been completely wonderful.”
Not a bad way to balance work and marriage, right?
Family Life: Raising Their Children Together
Lithgow and Yeager have built a beautiful family over the years. They share two adult children:
- Nathan Lithgow, 42
- Phoebe Lithgow, 43
In addition, Lithgow has an older son, Ian Lithgow, 53, from his previous marriage to Jean Taynton.
Despite Lithgow’s busy acting career, he has always been a dedicated father, and Yeager has been a constant pillar of support for their children and each other.
John Lithgow’s Net Worth & Their Life Together
With a career spanning over five decades, John Lithgow has accumulated an estimated net worth of $60 million (as of 2025). From winning multiple Emmys, Tonys, and Golden Globes to starring in blockbuster films and hit TV shows, Lithgow has had a truly iconic career.
However, despite the fame and fortune, he and Yeager have always led a down-to-earth lifestyle, prioritizing family, love, and intellectual conversations over Hollywood glitz.
What’s Next for John Lithgow & Mary Yeager?
Even at 79, John Lithgow isn’t slowing down. He’s still actively working in TV, film, and even theater. In 2025, he was announced as one of the presenters for the Academy Awards, proving that his career is still thriving.
As for Yeager, she’s happily enjoying retirement, traveling, and spending time with their children and grandchildren.
Their four-decade-long love story is proof that Hollywood marriages CAN last—as long as you have the right balance of love, humor, and a good set of relationship rules (like “Nothing useful”).
A Love Story That Keeps Inspiring
In a world where celebrity relationships seem to come and go in the blink of an eye, John Lithgow and Mary Yeager’s marriage stands as a beacon of love, loyalty, and partnership. Their story is one of two different worlds colliding, yet blending perfectly.
And if there’s one takeaway from their relationship, it’s this:
Find someone who makes you laugh, challenges you, supports your dreams, and never, ever buys you an electric can opener.